my mama forgot to tell me not to wear my underwear on backward

What?

You gals probably all have heard several times throughout your life the old sayin' "Always wear clean underwear" from your mama, grandma or someone.   Then you grow up and pass it on to your kids. I know I told my daughter that a few times.

Today, I had to go for my every three month visit to the DR to get my arthritis prescription refilled.  I want the earliest appointment they have.   The DR's office is just a few  minutes from my house on my way to work.  Our office is located at least 25-30 minutes away.  Therefore, if I get the later appointment then it is back and forth way to much for me.

I walk in for my appointment, when right behind me appears a Barbie Doll looking Pharmaceutical rep with a wagon (literally) full of catered breakfast sandwiches, orange juice, etc.  Not only was she looking like a Barbie, she had locks like Goldilocks.   I thought to myself, I will be here all day.

The bad thing is,  I for some reason,  left my phone on my desk.  I didn't have it.  I get into the exam room, look at my watch, only to find that it was dead.  So... no watch, no phone, no clock on the walls.

My DR's exam rooms are themes from Old Hollywood.  There is the #Elvis room (which is my favorite), the #Razorback room, The #Jazz room and the #MarilynMonroe room   Today, it was a new nurse, she puts me in the Marilyn Monroe room.  She does the blood work, etc. etc. and shuts the door and said you know DR will be in shortly.  Yeah, right!

I have excellent hearing.  I can hear Goldilocks giving her spill to the DR again..and...again...(you get the point.)  To his defense, he says "It was nice meeting you."  In other words, I'm tired of the spill and I will go see the patients now.  She persisted to keep on and on.

By this time, I am dying of boredom.  I look around for magazines, to find only men suited magazines in the room.   Great! I am in the Marilyn Monroe room with photos of her with her boobs hanging out, and just men magazines.   I try to open the door to go to the bathroom, and it won't open.  Great!   By this time, I am getting stressed.  Have no clue what time it is, I need to go to the bathroom, and they can't hear me, because Goldilocks is trying to romance them with catered full-course breakfast.   The nerve!   I rushed home last  night and #Bertha (my Kitchenaide beauty of a mixer) whipped up a great batch of homemade chocolate chip cookies (click here for recipe) to bring to the DR and nurses, and I am being ignored.  

By this time there is a big storm brewing in Little Rock.  I can hear the nurses ask the DR what do they do for cover.  REALLY?  I'm stuck in here with Marilyn, men magazines, and they are running for cover?

Finally, in walks DR.   I am flushed.  "I am hear for anxiety DR and you gave it to me" I told him.  I whipped out that beautiful bag of cookies and said give these a try.   Goldilocks might have trumped me but mine tasted so much better!    I inform the DR that I needed to be in the #Elvis room with the women's magazines.  This room clearly was designed for his male patients.  

I bet by now you are thinking, what does this have to do with underwear?  Well, here it is.  I rush to work, all along I am really having issues with my pants.   I can't figure out what is bothering me.   Lunch time arrives, I go with the "KID" at the office.   He rushes me so much I about choked on my food.

We get back to the office, about an hour had passed, I went to get my phone out to text someone and ..........................no bloomin' phone again!   You gotta love modern technology and "Find My I phone."   I had left it at the restaurant!   That Kid shouldn't have rushed me!

Gabby loves to get out of that chaos, so she jumps at the change to go and retrieve my phone.  I get to the bathroom and a miracle occurs!  I finally figured out my issue with my pants, pulling and tugging at me.   My underwear was on backward the whole morning!   

To all the gals (young and old) this mama is telling you to wear clean underwear and make sure they are not on backward.  Trust me, your day will go much better!

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MEET BERTHA - The best mixer ever! You can find one just like her on #amazon - just click on the photo and $$$$

BERTHA MADE THESE!!!